The Feminism of Motherhood

This Mother’s Day, amidst the flowers and breakfast-in-bed tributes, we would do well to reflect not only on the women who mother but on the deeply feminine qualities that make motherhood—and womanhood—so vital to our collective wellbeing. For too long, mainstream feminism has urged women to validate their worth by shedding the very traits that make them uniquely female: not just the capacity to bear life, but also the innate drive to nurture, to connect, to empathize, and to lead through relationships rather than domination. These deeply social and emotional gifts have been sidelined in favor of a model of success that too often asks women to become more like men.

The legacy of second-wave feminism urged women to seek equality by stepping into male roles—climbing corporate ladders, postponing motherhood, and outsourcing, if not eschewing altogether, caregiving. But in doing so, we’ve often undervalued something essential: the irreplaceable contribution of maternal presence in the lives of children, especially in the earliest years.

As a psychoanalyst, I’ve spent decades working with families. What I’ve seen—and what research continues to affirm—is that emotionally present, attuned mothers are not a luxury but a developmental necessity. We ignore this biological truth at the expense of our children’s mental health and our society’s future.

It’s time for a broader feminism—one that validates a woman’s choice to lead not just in public spheres, but through the profound influence of motherhood. This is what some are calling maternal feminism, a revival of the early feminist idea that to be a mother is not to step back from leadership, but to lead in a different, significant way.

Women like Carolina Sagebin Allen, Executive Director of Big Ocean Women, an organization staffed by women from diverse faiths and cultures, believe that maternal gifts are sources of strength. They are at the forefront of this revival. “There is a deep and sacred power within women,” says Allen. “It’s the power to both bear and nurture life. It’s the power to uplift others and shape our world—not despite our maternal gifts, but because of them.”

This is maternal feminism—an unapologetic embrace of the feminine genius that begins in the home but reverberates far beyond it. It is not a regression to traditionalism, nor is it a rejection of women in the workplace. Instead, it is the radical notion that motherhood matters—not just biologically but culturally, spiritually, and politically.

Such a perspective does not reject women in the workplace or deny their ambitions outside the home. It simply insists that caregiving, too, is a form of leadership—and one that ought to be socially, culturally, and economically supported. Instead of asking women to suppress their maternal instincts to succeed, we should redesign society to support and nurture those instincts. That includes flexible work policies, paid parental leave, and a cultural shift that stops asking women to justify the choice to be present for their children.

Today, many young women are quietly rejecting the notion that empowerment must mean masculinization. They crave a feminism that makes space for the whole of who they are, not just their professional ambitions, but also their relational, nurturing, and intuitive selves. They don’t want to choose between contributing to society and raising their children. They want a culture that sees these as deeply interconnected goals.

If we want emotionally healthy children, resilient families, and a flourishing world, we must start by honoring and empowering mothers, who are the foundation of our society. This Mother’s Day, remember that the world does not thrive despite mothers—it thrives because of them.